advice about my MNL?????

[jazz( jasmine )]

Soooo my MNL and i are having a little bit of an issue i think... so here is a little back story .. i love my MNL and things were great between us.. well my husband has been acting a little less then perfect and kinda mean for the past couple of years and it got to the point where i was asking both his parents and my parents for advice ... and when his mom found out that he was treating me poorly she of course was mad, embarassed and upset with him yet she wouldnt say anything to him about it or offering him any guidance ...but they were still talking at that point ...then one day we had called home to see how they were doing and she said something that pissed my husband off and my hubs was kinda chewing me out with her on the phone so she hung up on him...this was about 3 or 4 months ago and they havent talked since my hubs has tried to talk to his mother ( all superfical stuff but he has still tried ) and she was calling and talking to me or mostly texting cause she never calls ... she is using the excuse that she isnt talking to him because he was treating me poorly when really its not cause of that its more so because my husband doesnt call her all the time or check on his dad as much as they would like i guess... anywho but she is using the thing with me as a front so she doesnt have to confront the real issues between them ... which they have a few...
so anyway time goes by and my husband starts acting better and treating me much better ... and i have been trying to get them to talk ever since they stopped talking ( this isnt the first time) well before they stopped talking she was suppose to come out to where we live after i give birth to their first grandchild well after the whole phone thing i asked her when she was coming out here so i could have a room ready for her and she was like " well i dont know if im coming or not anymore... until he treats you and the baby youre having better i am not coming "... so like 2 weeks ago i tell he that both she and josh are being a little petty and not to stop talking to him on account of me and that we all need to resolve things because kylie is coming soon and i just think the whole thing was silly and not worth people not talking to each other over ... i said that both she and my husband were being stubborn. but all of it was sugar coated and respectful . well she didnt like this and was like well fine if youre happy with how he is treating you then fine .. and she got mad because i asked her if she could stop calling my husband richard cranium when she text me .. after all he is my husband still and yeah we butt heads but i didnt want to call him that .. plus my husband saw it once and i could tell he was crushed when he saw it and i felt sooo bad.
so ever since then now my MNL isnt talking to me too now and i doubt that she is coming out for the birth of the baby ... when i asked her if she was still coming she was just like i dont know ... and then like the other week or so ago i text her regarding my doc appointment and how the baby was doing and that we started birthing classes and she only responded with NICE TO KNOW when i text her happy holloween ( cause she isnt answering her phone ) she didnt respond at all... so finally i stopped trying to talk to her because mostly its me reaching out at this point and i finally realized its not my place to try and make sure that my hubs and his mom talk so i stopped trying to do that as well... but it just kinda hurts me because i know that my husband would like someone from his fam to be there and see the little girl that we made together so he could have like a proud dad moment ... but now they are not coming .... and im not sure if they were ever coming in the first place....

my husband has since started acting less grumpy and more affectionate towards me and more caring .. i think that he just had to get use to being married ... we have been together almost 3 years married for 1 and a half and i just think we hit a rough patch ... lately he has been more than sweet and as romantic as possible for him... which is watching wwe together and eating on the sofa lol but it works .... ive told both his mom and my mom what a difference he is making and how hard he is trying .. yes he has his moments but i can see him trying at this point and we have been happy and loving for the past 2 months or so... and we are both excited about the baby

*sigh * i just dont know why she is being like this i use to call of text her like everyday and now she isnt really talking to me at all ....

[Silver Xeno]

Since you gave such a broad backstory, I had to assume it was ALL relevant to your issue...And I never suggested divorce. What YOU think is or is not a good relationship isn't up to you when it's SOMEONE ELSE'S RELATIONSHIP. You might be 25...and not in highschool, but that's exactly what was happening in highschool. Everyone was involved in a relationship except for the 2 people actually IN the relationship.

[jazz( jasmine )]

no one said that you mentioned divorce silver ... divorce came up when i was stating why i was planning on leaving and reached out for help and advice from our family... and not everyone is involved in my relationship.. its not as if i went and told people at his job or his friends wives or the person who lives next door and no matter whos imput i ask for regarding my marriage in the end its up to me to do with that information what i will and thats what i did i decided to stick it out and work things through with my husband . and as far as what i think regarding what is a good relationship... i never said that it was up to me when it comes to my husbands relationship with his mother thats why i was asking if i should just let things be not only just for him and her but regarding his mom and me ... but anyone can see that this kind of behavior isnt good or conductive for a mother , son relationship and its not a good example of what family should do .. i dont believe you should cut people off unless they are being damaging to your life and if having a little tiff on the phone over something so petty is damaging to the point where it causes a person to cut off contact then they need to get a tougher skin.
lets just agree to disagree regarding the topic of seeking advice from your elders.... the issue has since been resolved with my MNL as said before she can be invovled in our life or not her choice and she will be missing out not me.. i just feel for my husband and the sadness i see on his face when the subject of his mother comes up.